I don't think I can do this anymore

For context: my ex fiance lied to me our entire relationship saying that he never masturbated only for me to find out (on top of him cheating) that he had been the whole time an lied to me about porn. I have no real issue with masturbation or porn in moderation but lying is a HUGE thing for me.

Now. My current bf and I have been dating almost 2 years and welcomed a son together 6 months ago. We only started living together a month before our son was born. I knew he was a hyper sexual person and understood that when we got together, I have a very high libido so I didn't think it would be an issue. That is until I started noticing him turn down sex with me to go masturbate for hours. Sometimes it almost seemed personal, I would explain how I felt unsatisfied with the lack of sex and he would acknowledge my feelings and then almost immediately go take care of himself without me. It hurt. And I talked to him about it and he told me it wasn't personal. About a month later we were having sex and we started off watching porn which I thought would be fine. He proceeded to not pay attention to me at all and watched the porn for the whole hour we were having sex. He only looked at me to cum. I was so hurt and felt so insecure afterwards and I told him that. He apologized and said that wasn't the intention and I know it wasn't but it really just made me feel so unattractive to him.

Fast forward to when I went on a trip with the kids to visit family, he was home alone for 2 weeks and he basically just masturbated and went to work the whole time. Come to find out, he was masturbating to a very specific porn that makes me feel extremely uncomfortable given things that have happened in my family and my having a daughter from a previous relationship.

I brought this up to him and he said he doesn't actually want this to happen in real life, it's just something he starts looking up when he's "gone too deep into porn" and watched too much, he starts going for more taboo stuff. We worked through it and he hasn't looked up anything like that since so I've moved on for the most part. However, recently we had a discussion about one of his friends who has a very specific, universally thought of as weird asf fetish and the psychology behind it. His friend doesnt really talk about his fetish a lot but my bf knows because they were really close at one point and his friend got him into it for about 2 years (4 years before we dated). My bf very adamantly said "he doesn't associate with those people because they and what they're doing are weird". Fast forward 16 hours later and he's looking up exactly that porn and masturbating to it! Not once but on 3 occasions since then (its been 4 days). Honestly If he came forward with it I might not be so upset and we could work through it but the fact that he so blatantly lied to my face is the biggest red flag for me. He knows how accepting I am and that I wouldn't judge him for any kinks he has, yet he chose to look me in the eyes and lie right to my face. How am I supposed to trust him? If he can lie about something he knows I'm not going to judge or be angry about, what else is he willing to lie about? What else has he already lied about and I just don't know?

I knew he had an issue before but with him diving further and further into the porn rabbit hole its getting harder for me to deny his addiction and conflate it to "normal male impulses".

I feel so uncomfortable and so insecure and I'm not an insecure person. It's all making me feel so crazy and paranoid but how can it be paranoia if it's actually happening?? I just want to take my kids and leave but I'm worried I'm being overdramatic.

I'm out of town for the weekend for my grandmother's funeral and so far he's just left my 6 month old son laying in his bassinet sleeping for hours while he goes in the room and looks at porn. He can't even take care of his own kid, he has to go do this?? I just don't think I can do this anymore! Any advice is appreciated !